Don't Make Me Kill You

Seriously, yo. This sensitivity thing is beyond whack. It wouldn't be so bad if Windu didn't insist on huggin me every five minutes cause he says I got "mommy issues" or whatev. He'd have mommy issues too if his mom died in his arms after bein enslaved by horrible beasts. But not like I'd say that or anythin. I mean, The Hero With No Fear don't play that way, yo.

Today I taught the pyro-padawans (the only ones I really get along with) how to start fires usin the Force. Saves em money on matches an lighters an spit, I figure. Unfortunately, one of 'em did it a bit too close to Windu, an the dude's robe caught fire. I didn't get in trouble cause startin fires is one of the few things I ain't known for doin, so that's all good.

We're supposed to do a "moral inventory" or sumthin. I don't really know what that means. I think we're supposed to, like, talk about what we need to change about ourselves or sumthing. He gave me this blue book to read - "The 12 Steps of Dark Side Recovery". Dunno if that's a hint or sumthin, but like I keep tellin ya'll, I don't play with the Dark Side.

He said he's gonna give me a list of all the stuff I gotta work on about myself. Believe me, ya'll will know it when that happens. I'm the Chosen One! I don't gotta work on spit. Sides the fact he hates me an'll pro'lly say I needta shave my head or sumthin (so not gonna happen).

Anyway, Pads is havin a party, so I'm all about that. Take my mind off this self-improvement dealy. I'm gonna wear sumthin even hotter than my normal kickin threads, but I haven't decided what yet. Prolly black. Prolly leather. Cause I'm hot like that, yo. But if Obs tries to put eyeliner on me again...